BOOMER GOES "KA-BOOM"

MOOSIC, Pa. -- You gotta love David Wells, you don't have to understand him. Or buy everything he has to say.

In a classic case of "he said, they said", Wells,  "Boomer " to those who know and love him, backtracked from what he is said to have said to a pack of Boston Red Sox beat writers in a 30 minute bull session, Saturday in Philadelphia.

In particular, Wells is said to have thrown pintsized Phillies outfielder David Dellucci under the bus, suggesting that Dellucci can thank modern (and illegal) science for his success as a home run hitter.

I know guys who were there.

Guys with notebooks.

And digital recorders.

Today, Wells, who fancies himself as a rebel (and as a 43 year old mega millionaire, what does he have to rebel againsts?) did some serious backtracking after today's rehab stint for the PawSox against the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Red Barons.

"I did not accuse David Dellucci whatsoever," he said angrily, responding to a question by Scranton Times-Tribune beat guy Chad Jennings. "I've known David for a long time, I've been his teammate. The man busts his (rear end) in the gym. He works out hard. But we were just having conversation. And I wasn't accusing him, or anything of the sort.
  "I don't think he is (on drugs) and if anyone has questioned it, I think it would be unfair for remarks that reporters made and took out of context. I think it should be cleared. I feel bad for him (Dellucci) but we were just making points. They were asking about little guys who go deep, and would they be (suspected) of steroids. A lot of people say yes, and a lot of people would say no. I feel bad for him, because he shouldn't have to go through that."

Okay.

So you're saying that you didn't say what they say you said?

To the guys with notebooks.

And digital recorders.

"I think the writers are (bleeping) horse (bleep)," he said, voicing either his true opinions, or running from them. I'll tell you that right now. That's just back penmanship (yes, he used that word) on their part. (more f-bombs). It's bull(hooey) how they try to (*$%&^$%&^*) bait you. The (bleep) or (bleeps) who did can go eat a bowl of  (more bleep). And you can quote me on that."

Well, now I can't really. Not verbatim, anyway.

We don't have many rules for the two teenagers in our house, but one of them is this: any word I use, they can use.

So they don't get used, at least not to my face, and certainly not in print.

I have to admit, though, that it was kind of fun watching Boomer go off like that. Kind of watching a car wreck, without the broken glass.

And of course he knew that what he told us was going to tack on another day's stay to what would have been a one-day story.

So, who was "booming" who?

But to hear Boomer tell it, there won't be any more rants from him to be taken the wrong way.

"You guys are the last ones," he said. "I'm not talking to any more reporters."

Not until tomorrow, anyway.